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I'm a mother of two beautiful girls. I think Sarcasm is a spiritual gift, even Jesus was sarcastic. I have no patience for people who are not real. I'm a Christian, but I hate how so many Christians have made that a bad word. My goal is to be a strong woman who loves God and encourages other women to do the same. I love upcycling and building things from repurposed items and reclaimed wood. We as women don't always see ourselves for the amazing women we are. It took me a lot of pain and hard work to find out who I am and what I am passionate about. I want other women to find their passions and not let others hold them back. Maybe some of my posts and projects that I will post will encourage other women to be who God wants them to be.

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Saturday, October 23, 2010

Don't be a runner

There are people who when things get hard or the are afraid will run from a situation. The figure it is easier to quit rather than try it and fail or end up hurt. The name for this kind of person is a runner. I know because I used to be one. Twice I had jobs that were difficult and caused me major stress so rather than stick it out I quit. I also quit piano lessons, violin lessons and I didn't try certain things I wanted to do because of fear of failure. When I was in 9th grade I actually missed three weeks of school strait because I had missed a week when I actually was sick and I knew it would be really hard to make up all of the work I missed, so I just faked being sick for a few more weeks until my mom forced me to go back to school and face what I didn't want to face. In the end, the make up for missing three weeks of school was so much worse than if I had just gone back after one. I might not have ended up in summer school that year.

You may know a runner or you may be a runner. They may be someone who goes from job to job and it is always with the excuse of the boss was a jerk or some other lame excuse. They may play the victim, or they may go from relationship to relationship looking for that new love feeling that is always at the beginning. There are a lot of different variations of runners, but they all think that it is easier to quit than to actually work at whatever they are doing.

As I said earlier, I was a runner. What changed that? I became a mom. Suddenly I couldn't run without hurting someone else. I had to actually stick it out or my children were going to be affected. I was no longer allowed to quit because I was afraid. Having children is hard, but I am not allowed to give up and walk away, not that I would want to, but knowing that is not even an option has made me not be a runner in other areas of my life as well. I have fought harder to keep things good for them. Have I failed at times? You bet I have, but running is still not an option.

In life we always have the choice of sticking it out when things are tough or running. What I learned from it is when I did run there was always regret years later when I looked back at what I had done. I regret not finishing both of the jobs I left early. In both cases I only had one month left until they were done, but it was easier at the time to quit than to suffer through the hard part.

I have seen women especially who have the runner mentality. Sometimes it is actually from their kids and or family. I have also seen women who run from their friends. They think they are a burden to them when they have drama in their life so they close themselves off from their friends and leave their friends wondering what they did. I'll admit I have been known to do that because I was embarrassed about a situation that I was in and didn't want to admit it to them.

The problem with being a runner is it doesn't solve your problem. It may remove you from a situation, but if you are trying to avoid failing, I have news for you, quitting is failing too and there is a pretty good chance you will end up in a worse situation later or right back where you were. So many of us have a fear of failure, but I have learned that we learn just as much from failing as we do from success and you learn even more from sticking it out and seeing it through to the end because you learn how to be a finisher.

If I could go back fifteen years and talk to my 22 year old self I would tell myself to stick it out, try harder and don't let fear of failure keep you from your dreams. I have learned that I am a stronger person than I ever thought possible by sticking to what I have committed to. Is it hard sometimes and does it really stink when I am going through a slump that doesn't seem to have any hope? Yeah it does! But I can tell you I regret running a whole lot more than I will ever regret sticking it out and dealing with the hard parts. Don't even let running be an option.

We all have critics in our lives we don't need to be our own. Don't let anyone take away your dreams most especially yourself.

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